The Positive Habit Weekly Blog – 27th November, 2017 – Give Genuine Compliments

Hello, my fellow Positive Habit people,

I hope you are well this Monday morning! We are now truly in the thick of the dark mornings and evenings and with this lack of external light we all need to work hard on keeping our internal levels of positive light healthy and strong.

Last week when I was in the bank I noticed that the young teller had the most amazing skin, so even though I was a little cautious about being familiar with someone I don’t know, I said, “You have amazing skin”! The girl was literally delighted, her beautiful skin glowed and she said “Thanks, so much, you have made my day.” Wow, that was simple, I thought and I felt a glow inside even though my skin wasn’t quite as amazing. Nevertheless, my inner glow at making someone’s day was pretty high.

What I Iove about compliments is the way they pass freely from one person to another.  You know when you think something nice about a person but either forget to tell them or are too embarrassed?  This week, capture those thoughts in your awareness and spread some sunshine by choosing to make people smile. IF you think of something nice about a person, if you notice they have a nice dress, cool shoes or even more importantly, that they are kind, fun or caring, TELL them! Genuine compliments only please not manufactured ones.

Those of you who have completed my online, self-help program, The Positive Habit, will know how I feel about gossip.  Gossip is toxic and is actually most harmful to the perpetrator and those who encourage it.  Unfortunately, gossip is highly prevalent with people often quick to criticise; for many the passing of a negative comment or making a judgment slips easily from the tongue. The Positive Habit is all about developing the awareness and habit of turning negative behavior into positive.

Make an effort to pay your friends, family, kids, strangers authentic compliments and you will make their day and your own.  Also, work on spreading positive vibes about other people by saying positive things;  the opposite of gossip. I don’t think we have yet developed a word for this? ‘Possip?’ mmmm…maybe back to the drawing board…

On a neurochemical level when we indulge in gossip we are sparking the production of lots of the stress hormone, cortisol in our brains and bodies. It never feels good to talk ill of other people and this is why cortisol is generated.  The old saying, ‘If you have nothing good to say…say nothing’ comes to mind. We probably all know people who are notorious for gossiping but when you are with these people make the conscious choice not to encourage or engage in gossiping. Believe me, these gossips will eventually stop looking to you for back up.

I was overjoyed with all the positive compliments on my TEDx so thank you.  I would like to share with you another TEDx talk by my colleague, Mark Kelly whose inspiring idea mirrors the theme of this weeks blog – when we do an act of kindness we feel better ourselves. To watch his talk, click here.

Please share this blog with five people in your network and spread the positive energy and also please do share my TEDx – the link is below and it is helping those who may be struggling with anxiety.